oh how i miss medical school…

So I’ve been away from medical school for almost two years now and I’m suffering from major burnout withdrawal. Yes, I WANT to be burnt out. I WANT to go to class at 8am. Come home at 4pm if I’m lucky. And study. Maybe eat. But mostly study. Go to bed at 2am and wake up at 7am to do it all over again. And again. And again. All the while still feeling woefully inadequate and undeserving of the trust placed in me by patients who trust me, a complete stranger, with seeing and caring for them at their most vulnerable. When I was going through it, I despised it. I was wrong. I miss it. I crave it. So much that I try to turn my current non-med student life into my med student life. But I can’t. So I’ll write about it instead.