how to infuriate me in seven simple steps

1. Wake up way too early to go to lab to do absolutely nothing after a not-so-restful weekend.

2. Arrive at lab to find out that I need to deal with some statistics for an animal protocol because my major professor is too busy doing nothing to deal with it himself (and maybe because he probably doesn’t even know any statistics).

3. Spend all day at lab doing nothing but coding my website because I don’t want to deal with statistics today only to realize that my ultimate vision is flawed so I have to start from scratch tomorrow.

4. Finally escape from lab only to get stuck in the worst traffic ever, turning a usual 20-minute trip home into an over one-hour long trip, complete with a large helping of the stupidest drivers ever just to test my patience as we all sit there at a dead stop in sweltering heat. And here all I wanted to do was make it to the Bath and Body Works sale before the after-work rush.

5. Go to Bath and Body Works anyway because it can’t possibly be that crowded in this small college town. Well, it can and it was. Search unsuccessfully for carrying bag for my more-than-my-little-arms-can-handle load of stuff. Debate whether or not to bother because I can’t find a bag. Decide that I’ve already invested way too much time and energy to leave empty-handed and stand in the obscenely long line with an armful of heavy-to-poor-little-me stuff for over 30 minutes with annoying entitled college kids yapping away loudly behind me as if they know everything there is to know about life while at the same time repeatedly bumping into me with the carrying bag that I was unable to get because they hogged them all. Fight urge to beat college kids over the head with my armful of heavy-to-poor-little-me stuff. Not to mention, these were the same kids who pushed their way in front of me to try all the products everywhere I went to try to avoid them. Seriously, just because you’re out spending your parents’ money while they think you’re studying doesn’t mean you have the right to act like you own the place. I’m so sorry I’m not spending my parents’ money—now can I please smell some lotion in peace?

6. Leave Bath and Body Works with sore arms from holding that armful of heavy-to-poor-little-me stuff to go to grocery store to grab some butter (an essential ingredient and the only thing I needed) for dinner only to find no parking. All I want is a stick of butter! And then of course, the 10 items or less line was not open.

7. Finally arrive home to find that my husband is lounging around munching (spoiling his dinner) and waiting for me to cook dinner instead of taking the initiative to at least get it started. It’s not that hard to cook rice, is it?

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