my life, my pace

I’m out of town this weekend, so here are some House-isms posts.

Sorry. Up late. Internet porn.

CHASE: How come you’re not in your office?
HOUSE: Because there is a computer in my office. If I long on, romance will ensue. My wrist might fall off.

FOREMAN: She got fired because you couldn’t swallow your pride.
HOUSE: An ultrasound? Excellent thought.

I’m not a baby expert, but I’m pretty sure babies shouldn’t shrink.

Did you make a pass at Cuddy? Told you. She only has thighs for me.

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Related posts:

1. heavy (season 1, episode 16)You have little people inside you. I guess I must have been brainwashed by the media…and all that medical training. Even if I was Dr. House, physician patient confidentiality protects me from annoying conversations. DISCLAIMER: All copyrighted content is the property of its respective owners....
2. family (season 3, episode 21)He didn’t look both ways before he nuked. We’re not GM.  No recalls, no rebates. WILSON: I treat patients for months, maybe years, not weeks like you. HOUSE: I’m taller. CUDDY: Do you have anything to add to this debate? HOUSE: Wilson’s right, Foreman’s wrong, and your shirt is way too revealing for the office. WILSON: I also believe in patients making their own choices. HOUSE: Because it lessens your guilt if things go wrong.  You’re not protecting their choices, you’re soothing your conscience. WILSON: By that logic, a sociopath would make the best patient advocate in the world. HOUSE: Am I blushing? CAMERON: Are you okay? HOUSE: I just tripped over Wilson’s self-righteousness. HOUSE: You’re pathetic.  I didn’t actually mean that. WILSON: Yes, you did. HOUSE: No, I didn’t.  To infinity. Adults don’t need adult conversations, just like I don’t need this one. DISCLAIMER: All copyrighted content is the property of its respective owners....
3. spin (season 2, episode 6)STACY: We need to talk. HOUSE: Oh god. Are you pregnant? Because I really want to finish high school. You know me. Hostility makes me shrink up like a…I can’t think of a non-sexual metaphor. MANAGER: We’ve got confidentiality, right? HOUSE: Assuming I’m more ethical than your client. Respiratory distress. And insanity doesn't cause it. I looked it up. CAMERON: We don’t make careers out of who can stay awake the longest. CHASE: Really? Ever been to oh, I don’t know, med school? [lol] I love when you do both sides of the conversation. It’s like white noise. It's very peaceful. WILSON: Is there a light somewhere that goes on when I have food? HOUSE: Green for food, orange for beverages, red for impure thoughts. That bulb burns out every two weeks. When you save someone’s life, they owe you forever. WILSON: Uh, Mark is in group therapy for people coping with disability. He was thinking about developing a drug addiction but that would be stupid. HOUSE: Hey! You’re…you again! What makes a guy start drooling? Chase, were you wearing your short shorts? HOUSE: Go forth and scan his neck. CHASE: His neck? HOUSE: Or repeat everything I say in question form. DISCLAIMER: All copyrighted content is the property of its respective owners....

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